We have four kids so we have had more than our fair share of sass over the years. When it first begins, it seems that the kids are testing to see what they can get away with. However, if parents don't tackle it early, they can be in for a very long season of snarky, sassy kids with attitude. While it's normal behavior, it's definitely something you want to put a stop to if you can.
Here are a few ideas on getting through this stage with as little damage (to anyone) as possible:
1. Limit access to television.
Most of us have been guilty of letting down our guard on what our children watch on TV as they get older. However, if you stop and carefully listen and watch some of the shows that are aimed at our school-age children these days, you will probably be shocked! You might also hear a few phrases your child has been saying or at least pick up on the attitude you may have been seeing.
My first measurement of whether my child should be watching something is if the main characters are my children's peer group. My 10-year-old does not need to be watching shows with kids in high school who in these popular shows tend to be sneaking out, arguing with mom or dad, lying, disrespectful, and more. Even if the shows have a "happy ending," it's not what my younger kids need to be watching (and learning from).
2. Be a good example.
Be careful about how you speak. Your kids are listening - while you are on the phone, talking to other parents at school pick up, all the time. Use a tone you want to hear and words you want them to use.
3. Talk to them about it.
I don't mean in the heat of the moment. But when they are telling you about something someone said at school or something their sibling said to them. Talk about how it made them feel and ask how it could have been said differently, etc.
Will this stop all the sass or attitude? Not likely. However, keep in mind that it's really not personal and make a conscious effort to follow these three tips and you will probably see a significant change.
